Wednesday, April 1, 2026

Probably necessary this Friday

That’s some lab

These stupid appointments are cutting into my drinking time

Damn man you are on one

I just did two days of work in 2 hours

I’m strangely not hoeny today

That means you’re dying

April fools 😏

You’re still dying

We all are

You’re dying faster

https://x.com/ddawkins66/status/2039352370597859634?s=46

*halo voice* BETRAYAL

Washed

Accurate

I’m sure it’s an April fools joke

An yeah I forgot about that

I guess he’s not washed then

I’m excited to see what the Iran war April fools is

One last yuengling to slay

Slay

Supposed to be like 70 this weekend

Are you trying to fucky

Seems like prime fucky weather

I would fucky

I still need to see Hail Mary

And an afternoon of some drinking then a movie and dinner might be the move

I could probably do that Friday

Not sure if I can drink all day Friday but I could see movie and have dinner

Have a stupid deadline that day

But it could wrap up before Friday

https://x.com/john_wilddog/status/2039238484142243861?s=46

He carries the flame

One final yuengling on the mall

Cig pic plz

Patience

One civil offense at a time

I thought you already slayed your last Yuengling

One snuck into my bag

It was either here or slam at tsa

You really could have streamed this and become an instant icon

On how to live a good life

Sort of an anti manosphere

But I know you just do it for the love of the game

Finally got a photo with Trump

What’s the over/under sitting at for your flight home?

I cannot imagine any different

3.5

Should be dealing with some headwinds/jet streams, slowing you down. Makes the over enticing…

It’s a longer flight, indeed

Hope many deep are you currently?

The amount of intoxication can lead to an acceleration of alcohol consumption as well

Vegas may not be taking this into account

Today? Idk like 7 so far

1-2 at airport

First team all pro drinker

I blame my work for making me do this

https://x.com/thomaswright08/status/2039322811768905757

Banger

Do you guys all want Trump 2028 hats from the airport?

Guys, meadows season passes for next year are on all sale now!

$629 value pass

Tempting to buy now tbh

But that blacked.com Friday deal is really good

Yeah I mean 6/3XX is about as good as it gets

Unless you can go more

Why don’t they have smoking cages at airports anymore?

It’s inhuman

https://x.com/graceapriliyh/status/2039148471123661108?s=46

https://shop.sega.com/collections/sanic-april-fools-collection

Should I cop?

The whole collection

Yeah it’s fire

Alright guys I’m ready to crush the over

Place your bets on poly market

Place your bets on ass.shit

Kyle gayming the system just like real poly market

The real money is how many times I crank it in the lavatory

https://www.reddit.com/media?url=https%3A%2F%2Fi.redd.it%2F79zd9vrk7lsg1.jpeg

Would be a good rename in pdx too

https://x.com/halfwaypost/status/2039422926596849873?s=46

I’ve heard this before and I really wonder if Trump shits himself or if this is just really coarse slander

Man has been on a diet consisting exclusively of Big Macs for like 30 years

Might be time for a shiny new butthole

I can’t see the link but I think he maybe had an asshole injury from a tent pole?

Some victim somehow jammed it into his ass

You’re hitting the over for sure

Reacted ✴️ to “Might be time for a shiny new butthole ”

We have been sitting on the tarmac for like 30 minutes

I’m sobering and it’s scaring me

Piss your pants

That’s my second concern

Shit your pants

I’ve never shidded on a plane and I hope that doesn’t ch age today

Alexis de Strocqueville

Jesus Christ. We have to taxi again to get more fuel so we can take off from a different direction

This. Is. Hail.

You should make a scene

That would speed things up for sure

Take your gun out

Are you a prolific plane shidder Dan?

I’ve never in my recollection

😏

lol they are letting us get off the plane

I’m gonna go slam some liquor

How could they give me a voucher when I already get free drinks?

lol 30-45 minutes to add more fuel

This is going to fuck with the spread

Plenty of time for you to refuel

I’m seeking liquor as we speak

Side action on kyle getting back on this plane today?

At the bar

That old fashioned went down quite fast

Inebriate returning

Mas

Got time for another then

Surprisingly cheaper for an airport

Slam the over for this flight

Preemptive forced shid outside of plane

Stream of conscious

My mother is a fish

If anyone gets that reference ill buy them a beer

Sometimes

Man nothing raises spirits like alcohol

Except more alcohol

Or maybe an hj

I’m still at 0 for this flight

Still taxied matter of fact