Friday, February 24, 2023

That place sucks

Too many annoying little dogs/kids

What time and what should I bring?

Youre telling me

5:30 and byod

It’s her nephews birthday

Whoa man

Rule number one

Guess it’s Manhattan time

Check your helmet?

No, have a good time

420 cum

There it is

A classic

Simple but pure

Move the kid

Move the kid

Anyone know if Max is Hoen?

https://www.theonion.com/why-do-all-these-homosexuals-keep-sucking-my-cock-1819583529

Oldie but goodie

Widdo mouf check

How’s everyone doing?

I’m high and drunk

Utilizing my widdle mouf

Go on

Imagine that was just an imagine of the feelin fine

Imagine dragons

May thy cum runneth over

Having a bout of horningtons over here

Well this snow has unfortunately fucked our chances of curing they with hoen lunch

Cure it with cum

Look at this mama dedication

Mans

I can hoen to thst

Damn Grindr was just trending and it changed right as I went to take a screenshot

https://twitter.com/ericakland/status/1629143145949560837

Mayo Pete is my least favorite politician

More of a Ron DeSantis man

Yes I have way more respect for Ron DeSantis than Mayo Pete

Wouldn’t vote for either of them but thats moot

Is it because Pete is openly gay?

No its because he’s a slimy CIA spook

Let’s go now we’re talking

Todays bathroom log

I mean he went straight from the CIA to politics, managed to go from mayor to a fucking presidential campaign, it’s very obvious why he gets the boost he doe

Had the texture of an old, gnarled oak

Fuck Desantis

Liking anyone more than mayo pete is not an endorsement

I like Bender’s morning log that we just heard about more than mayo pete

Honestly it was a really good log

An instant classic

Care to join me in a belt of scotch?

Wrong answer

I want a drink

Are you trapped in the hills Dan? I have to imagine its a shit show up there

Had to go down 82nd and Lombard yesterday afternoon and the number of cars still ditched in the road was amazing. This city is so worthless sometime

Yeah you got some steep hills to traverse as well

It’s fucking pathetic they can’t clear main roads

Just went for a walk and found my garage door open and a bike track through the snow and my bike gone

That’s tight

Damn man

Fuck man that blows

It seems someone picked the little lock

Fuck people

Damn

That sucks

I’m sorry dude

That’s extremely weak

Thanks

I just put the key into the lock to test it and the whole inside lock component pulled out with the key

I think someone picked it aggressively

Or punch it somehow?

Yeah I don’t know how

Might be worth filing a report and showing the broken lock - maybe I could get property insurance coverage?

Maybe depending on deductible

And cost to replace the bike

Thanks

Looks like my property deductible is $500 so might be worth it

Yea wonder if you can get a beefed up lock in the process and get reimbursed for it

The thing that bugs me is they seemed to know what they were going for

Like they had cased this out or something

And that gives me a bad feeling, like stay away from me

Yea that feeling is understandable but I imagine they were looking for a bike and they were looking to be quick

Its icky that they probably saw you leave though?

I should have been hiding in there cranking my hog when they came in

That would have given them quite a fright

Coincidentally, my friend Mike Cathcart sent me this photo last night

Incriminating as fuck, given the events that unfolded

The only reasonable response it to sit in the garage cranking your hog with a weapon 24/7

Booby trap it

Dr. Kyle

What would you consider one medium sized cap and stem to be?

If I eat just one for my warehouse party tomorrow

If you send me a pic I could guess, I may or may not have been dosing twice a week now

Here’s a cpl reference pics might help



Love this

Thank you, Matt

I will likely send a pic tomorrow as I determine my approach

If mattress comes out as an opener I’m fucking bailing tho

Idk if eyeballing works very well for shrooms

I have some that are large and weigh nothing

And smaller ones that are a gram

Thanks, Kyle

That makes me feel better

Just take whatever you got

You’ll be fine either way

The entire bag it is

I think dubstep in a warehouse will be more fun than compacted into a claustrophobic Mattress show regardless

Like visually fun no matter what

Well I do have that scale if you want to weigh shit out at some point

Weird if I weigh my hog?

Weirder if you didn’t

Hmm. I’ve never weighed my hog

Should it be weighed engorged or flaccid?

Both and the difference is your growth factor

Please sent us the delta

I feel like all hog measurements should be taken while fully erect

Flaccid numbers are meaningless

Bullshit

We demand the growth factor

Here’s your growth factor

https://twitter.com/ryantalbotbills/status/1629182551691599874?s=46&t=U0W1LvOwHDjSxqiBms_2aw

If that doesn’t engorge a Buffalo Billy pp I don’t know what will

Henry is bigger than Von?

He’s very big

We can’t afford that

Probably just beastin together

You can afford him when diggs goes to Dallas

Watch your mouth

Crybaby diggs*

🤐

I feel like length and circumference would be better for growth factor than weight

Those are just further data points in calculating penis power

https://twitter.com/pollo2x/status/1629194013273391104?s=46&t=U0W1LvOwHDjSxqiBms_2aw

That’s the idea

It’s an artistic choice

Exactly

Ok this is actually good thk

Tho

https://twitter.com/pollo2x/status/1629194013273391104?s=46&t=U0W1LvOwHDjSxqiBms_2aw

That’s the same shit

Can only be one upped by linking us one of his own bad tweets

Fuck

I swear to god

Twitter moved the copy link button and I keep bookmarking things

https://twitter.com/rob_sheridan/status/1629214314702966784?s=46&t=U0W1LvOwHDjSxqiBms_2aw

Real ones know this pizza

Goatza

Evan, that’s happened to me many times recently as well

🤌🏻

Like what the fuck are they doing over there i swear to god they keep changing it

Like that shit is not going to bring your ad revenue back

https://twitter.com/AdamSchefter/status/1628874548983607305?s=20

I am shidding

Splendid

!

I’m farding

On an open mic

Hot mic, hot fart

I miss suae

Same

How did I miss China dropping this 🔥doc this week

https://www.fmprc.gov.cn/mfa_eng/wjbxw/202302/t20230220_11027664.html

Good stuff

I’m a Japan man, you know this!

Anyone G&D?

gay & drunk?

Close

Gay and dead

Bingo

I’m hoen

Anyone else just get yelled at by Chinese people for an hour?

Uh

No

Last night playing age of empires, yeah

thatsmyfetish.webp

Papa Murphy’s secured

Time for beer

The next IOS should have dick/balls recognition

Like you unlock it with your peebins

Of you don’t think that dick/balls unlock would be the most popular app in the AppStore you don’t understand people

Not secure at all