Hoen Lunch
The formalized institution of the **[[Hoen]]** — a midday gathering of Newfound Glory Hole members at a restaurant of approximately Mediterranean or sandwich-based intent.
Hoen Lunch
The formalized institution of the Hoen — a midday gathering of Newfound Glory Hole members at a restaurant of approximately Mediterranean or sandwich-based intent.
Hoen Lunch is the structured, scheduled, location-having form of the verb to hoen. While a hoen is a posture, a Hoen Lunch is a calendar event, and proposals for one are the most common type of message in the Newfound Glory Hole after the + acknowledgment. The phrase appears as a bigram thirteen times in the corpus, almost always followed within an hour by either Blutos or by silence.
History
The need for an institutional framework was first articulated by Daniel Miller on 2026-02-11:
"We need a hoen lunch scoreboard" — Daniel Miller
No scoreboard has been built. The proposal nonetheless established Hoen Lunch as a thing, distinct from the broader concept of hoening, and within 48 hours Evan Bbbender had declared "Hoen lunch is not a joke" and announced "We're going to start using the hoen lunch chat" — a separate iMessage thread which, like all secondary chats, has been used twice and abandoned in favor of the main thread.
Canonical venues
Through ten weeks of revealed preference, the chat has converged on a small rotation:
| Venue | Style | Notes |
|---|---|---|
| Blutos | Mediterranean / sandwich | "It's blutos dude it's always blutos" — Evan Bbbender, 2026-04-02 |
| Dimos | Pizza by the slice | Surged in popularity after the establishment of Dimos@1230 protocol |
| Grand Fir | Brewery + food | Considered the "double dip" option due to its proximity to other venues |
| Hat Yai | Thai fried chicken | First proposed as "Hat Yai Hoen" by Cullen Conway on 2026-05-05 |
| Jerry's | American / patio | The only venue formally accused of being a cowardly hoen location |
Protocols
The group has, through trial and error, settled on several conventions:
- Lock-in time: Hoen Lunch nominally begins at 12:30 PM. The convention was crystallized by Daniel Miller on 2026-04-02 with the message "Should we lock in Dimos@1230", immediately formalized as Dimos123 and briefly proposed by Evan Bbbender as his email password.
- Cullen rule: As stated by Matt on 2026-04-02: "If Cullen is joining its Blutos otherwise it's Dimos". The rule has been respected through several subsequent lunches and is the closest thing the chat has to a written constitution.
- Weather override: "It's not blutos weather" — Evan Bbbender, 2026-03-12. Hoen Lunch venue is partially weather-dependent, with Blutos being warm-weather-only.