Charlie Kirk
Charlie Kirk is the political commentator whose September 10, 2025 shooting first dragged his name into the Newfound Glory Hole and whose subsequent posthumous memification — the 'We Are Charlie Kirk' song, the 'Kirk method,' and the chat's joke domain halupedia.com/charlie-kirk — has made him one of the longest-running through-lines in the corpus.
Charlie Kirk
Charlie Kirk, the American political commentator, occupies in the Newfound Glory Hole the unusual position of a fully external figure whose name has become a shared shorthand. He enters the corpus abruptly on the day he is shot, September 10, 2025, and recurs steadily over the next eight months as a song lyric, a verb, a doctrine, and finally a fictional URL.
This article also has the unusual property of being the only article in Hoenipedia whose URL was anticipated, in fictional form, by the chat itself: on the evening of May 13, 2026, before this site existed under its present name, Evan Bbbender posted a fabricated URL https://halupedia.com/charlie-kirk as the chat's final message of that day. The domain was not real. The article was not written. The encyclopedia took the suggestion under advisement and produced this one (under a different name; see Hoenipedia for the disambiguation).
The shooting
The first mention of Charlie Kirk in the corpus is by Matt at 19:39 UTC on September 10, 2025:
"Charlie Kirk got shot let's go"
Within the hour Daniel Miller posted a screenshot caption from social media — "Video posted on social media shows the moment Charlie Kirk was shot and the seconds leading to the incident" — and the next day delivered the chat's settled position:
"Went on a Charlie Kirk binge, profoundly disagree with pretty much everything this guy ever said. It's sad he died though, wasn't horrible person." — Daniel Miller, September 11, 2025
Evan Bbbender floated the obligatory conspiracy theory the same day ("Do you think the government killed Charlie Kirk?") and on September 18 observed that "the internet... fucking hates censorship. Like trying to stop people from speaking freely about Charlie Kirk will not work out the way they hope it will." The same day Daniel grouped him with prior assassinations in a four-word post:
"JFK, MLK, Charlie Kirk"
"Merced"
The shooting produced a chat-internal verb. On November 3, 2025 Kyle Derrick posted "I think nfl is less rigged than Charlie getting merced" — Merced (here unrelated to Max Lieberman's partner Mercedes) functioning as a passive verb for being shot. Kyle reused the construction on January 29, 2026 in the message that produced the Kirk method:
"I do like the thought of Kirk having left shid in the toilet before getting Merced."
Matt replied within seven minutes:
"The Kirk method apparently."
See The Kirk Method for the doctrine that emerged from this exchange.
"We Are Charlie Kirk"
On November 23, 2025 Evan posted: "Woke up with the Charlie Kirk song stuck in my head my day is ruined." The Charlie Kirk song — whose existence outside the chat is not confirmed by the corpus — first appears in a directly quoted lyric form on January 5, 2026 in a four-line Evan post:
">roll up to the mountain
open all doors
crack a beer
max volume 'we are Charlie Kirk'"
The line "We are all Charlie Kirk" is endorsed by Brian Ambuel on January 13, 2026, and on January 25 Matt offers the variant "You are Charlie Kirk you carry the flame." The fully spelled-out karaoke proposal arrives on April 10, 2026 from Cullen Conway:
"Should we do a full group karaoke of We Are Charlie Kirk tomorrow night?"
The proposal, as of this writing, has not been carried out.
The Kirk Cousins error
A separate Kirk thread — Vikings quarterback Kirk Cousins — has run throughout the entire corpus, beginning in 2020 ("Kirk is braver than any cop", Matt, 2020-09-13). On March 11, 2026, Evan Bbbender posts a screenshot caption that reads only "First look at Kirk cousins in a Vikings jersey," the chat's clearest example of a deadpan, no-context joke that assumes the reader will not need to be told whether the Kirk in question is the political figure or the football player.
The fictional URL
On May 13, 2026 at 19:06 UTC, the chat's most recent message, Evan Bbbender posted simply:
The link was, when posted, not real — neither the domain halupedia.com nor the article it pointed at existed. The link is preserved here as a chat artifact and as the proximate trigger for the construction of Hoenipedia (which is named for hoen, not for Evan's fictional URL — see Hoenipedia for the naming disambiguation).